Pass

You don’t get a pass for making it this far in life without committing a crime.  I’ll give you a gold star if you’ll stop crying though.  It’s difficult to wipe your nose when your hands are cuffed behind your back.  I’m tired of looking at that snot hanging off your upper lip, but not tired enough to do anything about it myself.

It’s not like I caught you making a California stop, a Pittsburgh left, or a Miami, well, driving like anyone in Miami.  You tried to break into an ex-boyfriend’s house and drove off when you were unsuccessful.  Then, when you agreed to meet with him (and by him I mean me) to talk about what just happened, you showed up to the rendezvous point hammered.

You did make a valiant effort to dump the contents of your purse behind the passenger seat when you saw me coming. Unfortunately, I found the bottle that contained pills of many different shapes and colors.  My finely tuned detective skills quickly determined it wasn’t full of Flinstone Vitamins.

You’re on a roll.  Most people start small and work their way up to the big stuff.  You hit a home run on your first try. Congratulations on the Felony.  No passes tonight.

 

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2 Responses to Pass

  1. Mad Jack says:

    What, pray tell, is a ‘Pittsburg left’? This is a new one for me.

    • inkedcop says:

      Mad Jack, A “Pittsburg Left” is when the first car in the left turn lane guns it and makes a left turn when the light turns green before oncoming straight traffic can get in the intersection. I don’t recommend it. Drive safe.

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