Seeing you answer the door naked wasn’t exactly the highlight of my day either. You might be upset that I woke you up at the ridiculously early hour of 6 am, but I’m upset that the last thing I saw before my weekend started was your junk. Believe me, I wanted to turn my flashlight off. The last thing I wanted to do was illuminate your package, but you were acting like such a tool I needed to see what was going on.

I appreciate you putting on a pair of shorts. Why you couldn’t have taken the extra three seconds to do that before you answered the door is beyond me. I’m not even holding the flashlight up to help me see anymore. I’m holding it up because I’m going to feed it to you if you make one aggressive move. Despite how big your mouth is, I don’t think it’ll fit, but damn if I’m not gonna give it my best effort. Open wide.

One Response to Maglight

  1. Okay, this deserves an A+ for comic relief. I laughed. You’ve earned a brownie point…

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