You can make fun of us for rolling deep on a call all you want, but we’re all going home safe tonight. I’m not sure if you’re aware of it, but this apartment complex is pretty much just the jail’s doormat. It’s like a satellite housing unit. The major difference is you can open your door whenever you want, and everyone here is carrying a weapon.

Which brings me to my next point. How do you confuse, “Do you have any weapons on you,” with, “If you have a weapon on you go ahead and reach behind your back and grab it?” If you did that in the city they would be tying a tag on your toe about right now. To answer your previous question, people like you and your fine friends are the reason we bring so many cops on these calls.

By the way, who carries an ice pick for protection? This isn’t Basic Instinct. If you’re going to go to jail for carrying a concealed weapon you might as well make it something you won’t be embarrassed to be caught with, like a lipstick knife.

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